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ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. [Dec. 6th, 2008|04:32 pm]
[Current Location |american innn]
[Current Mood |i'm not sure.]
[Current Music |random talking.]

at american inn at my cousin's jade birthday party.
it's been 11 weeks.

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woah. [Sep. 18th, 2008|07:11 pm]
[Current Music |i hate my life- theroy of a deadman.]

so it's been 3 weeks since i've posted anything.
there's so much to say.

school has been awesome.
i love seeing friends.
marching band has been FANTASIC.
yeah, i know, stupid word to use.
homecoming is comin up.
i like this dude.
idk if he likes me.
it's hard to tell.
i wish i knew.
but who doesn't want to know who likes them?
yeah, so.
tomorrow is a football game.
i'm in colorgaurd.
for all u weird people.
it's those SAWEET people spinning flags when the band plays.
i'm so excited.
then after i'm going to my friend andrea's house.
woot woot.
and my friends jessie and emily are coming too.
all of us are in color gaurd.
then saturday we are going to CEDAR POINT!!!!!!!!!!!
i'm so excited.
like seriously, dude, you have no idea.

well, there's a lot more.
but, i don't feel like typing.
talk to ya'll later.

peace out.

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hehe. [Aug. 26th, 2008|09:52 pm]

going camping from wednesday until monday.


enuf said.

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no comment. [Aug. 17th, 2008|09:29 pm]
[Current Location |home]
[Current Music |none]

my family was here for a week.
the best week of my life.
when all the people i love are in one state.
[well, most of them] 
now there gone and all i can do is cry.
people might tell me. 
"melanie you'll see them again. just suck it up"
and i can't.
no one understands me.
it's like i'm alone in this world.
i love my family so much and don't know what i would do without them.
those months without them is when i don't even have any words right now.
i don't even fricken care if i'm making sense.
i can't stop crying.
i asked my mom if i could go to a soccer game with a lot of my guy friends playing.
but no i can't because i don't go to my brothers games.
i want to see my friends.
they are the only people i have.
people say u can be addicted to killing, kinds of foods, anything.
i am addicted to seeing my friends and hanging out with them.
i am addicted to being with my family.
and without these addictions being fulfilled.
i crash, break down.
i-i dont' even know what to say.
my grandpa, my aunts, my grandma.
there gone.
and i can't see them for almost another year.
and i get yelled at to want to go see my friends.
tom and my mom don't want me to have a life.
to be a teenager.
i'm not stupid.
i won't do stupid things.
no one trusts me.
i have a problem.
it's called crying more than a person should.
crying so many times a day, month, year.
that it burns to cry.
that it feels like fire is coming out of ur eyes.
i'm just tired of it.

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the hiking. [Jul. 17th, 2008|12:03 am]
[Current Location |home.]
[Current Mood |sleepysleepy]
[Current Music |none.]

i'm writing a book. 
and its goin very well.
that is all. 
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wow. [Jul. 14th, 2008|12:27 pm]
[Current Location |finally home.]
[Current Mood |no emotion. to many.]
[Current Music |none.]

so, i'm in love, with a boy that has a girlfriend.
he's my bestfriend.
his girlfriend is being gay.
we talked last night.
i told him i loved him and so many more things.
and he told me things i thought i could never DREAM of.
i wish i could say.
i wish i could just poor out our whole conversation right now.
but i can't.
now what do i do with this guy that wants to ask me out wednesday and i am supposed to be goin over there?
what do i tell him?
no idea.
i need help.
and i'm gonna go call someone and get it.


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how do you stop a waterfall with two hands... [Jul. 11th, 2008|03:42 pm]

 so my grandpa left this morning.
and he was supposed to come back tonight.
well, the machine at his business is broke.
the part was supposed to come in today but it didn't.
it is comin in tomorrow.
i am leaving tomorrow.
i can't breathe.
its like my body won't let me.
and if i do... its uneven.
i'm trying so hard to keep the tears in.
he's the only one i have.
and i don't get to see him.
he is supposed to come to michigan in a month.
but i think work is gonna stop him.
i don't know what to do.
i'm tired of loving someone and then i have to leave and my heart gets ripped to pieces until the next summer.
i need him.
but its impossible.
so how do i stop these tears?
it can't be done unless he is here with me.


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party timeee. [Jun. 23rd, 2008|01:56 pm]
[Current Location |home. LEAVING TOMORROWWW!!!!!!!!]
[Current Mood |giddygiddy]
[Current Music |nonnenee. jaycee is sleeping.]

my party was a lot of fun.
at the beginning it was beyond boring.
but then it got soo much better.
i wish it didn't rain.
but it only rained for maybe a half an hour.
i have 38 pictures on my myspace.
but those are after a lot of people let.
i didn't really think about takin pictures until later in the  day.
sooo, oh well.

i'm leaving to go on a plane to louisiana tomorrow.
i need to go clean and start packing.
there are no words at all to tell you how excited i am for this trip.
its like explaining how water tastes. 


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so, [Jun. 21st, 2008|03:11 pm]
[Current Location |home. hopefully leaving soon.]
[Current Mood |contentcontent]
[Current Music |smells like teen spirit-nirvana.]

today i didn't do anything until around 1.
i cleaned, ate.
the basics.
took a shower.
then i'm waiting for my mom to come home from a walyee[however u spell it] tournament.
because i want to go to megans graduation party.
her starts at 5.

i can't wait until tomorrow.
its my party.
i;m gonna look so cute.
but i'll have to change when it gets darker out.
i'm bored.
i have nothin to say.

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okay so, [Jun. 20th, 2008|10:20 pm]
[Current Location |hommmmmmeeeeeeee.]
[Current Mood |tiredtired]
[Current Music |something on the radio. Z93 =]]

i was rudely awakened by a baby screaming.
it was so bogus.
i got out of bed and was wonderin why bubba was takin care of his kid.
and of course he was "sleeping"
he "sleeps" a lot.
if your a little slow[weird for me to say, lol]
when it may lool like he's sleeping.
he's actually not and just wants someone else to pick her up.
so then i got ready to clean around 1-ish.
but then tom walks in the door and told me that bubba wants me to babysit.
[only if he cleans the kicthen i say]
so here it is 10:22 at night and bubba is cleaning the kicthen.
all i had to do was watch his kid so he could go fishin.
but it kinda sucked because she was majorly cranky.
and not its 10:23 and jaycee still hasn't gone to bed.
she won't stop makin these little fake wimpery crys.

so how would you feel if you called someone to invite them to something, left a message for them to call u back.
then you get on the computer and that person's ex-boyfriend begs you not to invite them because they don't get along.
so you say oh alright i only left a message.
then they call back the nextt day[today]
so idk what to say and say she can come.
so now i have to tell this boy.
this boy likes me and i only like him as a friend.
but now i have to tell him this and idk what to say.
i'm just gonna come right out with it, i mean there both my friends.
and its my party.
but that sounds kinda harsh.
but it is...
i've boreded you enough will my talking.
so talk to ya'll later.


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